The Pirates Return! And Norrington Too!
by Alex202
Summary: Jack picks up Elizabeth and Will in Tortuga and Norrington follows. Norrington is trapped and has to live with what he hates most; pirates. And the Pirates have to live with what they hate most; Norrington
1. Port Royal: Away and back again

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Pirates of the Caribbean. 

**Author's Note**: I just redid Chapter 1 AGAIN because it is easily me least favorite chapter. I actually ended up disliking my revised copy more than the original. I am finally feeling better though so I can keep my head on my shoulders as I am writing this. However future chapters (Chapters 4 and beyond) will be reviewed and revised several times before posting. This may mean less frequent posting but I think that it will be well worth it. Thanks for reading, review as well if you don't mind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            Jack watched Port Royal fade into the sunset as he sailed away on the Black Pearl. He thought he would never have to see that bloody place again. Full of annoying people who are annoyingly full of themselves. All of their bloody, "can't steal this ship," talk. They act as if they were talking to any ordinary pirate instead of _Captain Jack Sparrow_. He sailed into the horizon until Port Royal was but a distant memory.

            He watched his men swab the decks and man the masts. People had gotten to work right away. Obviously the horror Jack had once inflicted as Captain was still engraved into each man's mind. He staggered around the ship feeling her curves, her wood work. He loved every nick in the wood. He loved the spot where previous captains had carved their names. He smiled as he noticed that Barbossa had never carved his name. You had to be shown where the spot was, it was almost impossible to find it yourself.

            He stepped into his old cabin. He would of course need a new bed, he couldn't have something that Barbossa had ever slept in. He shuddered at the thought. 

            He went back on deck to guide his ship through the murky waters. He loved the sound of that, _his_ ship. _HIS _ship. "_My _ship. MY SHIP!!!!"

            "Sir?" Gibbs inquired, "you OK?"

            "Oh go make yourself useful Gibbs." And then more quietly, "bloody eunuch"

            "Let me take over Jack." Anna-Maria said. "You've already worked yourself hard. Today you had a noose around your neck, swam half a liege, and had to get within 15 feet of Norrington. Go take a break, this ship isn't going anywhere."

            Jack remained uncertain… "we picked up quite a bit of rum while in Port Royal…"

            "Well I could use a bit of a pick me up" Jack agreed as he handed the wheel to Anna-Maria.

            Jack woke up in the galley with a near empty bottle of rum in has hand. "Breakfast is ready!" He yelled happily. He took a swig and ambled onto deck. "Anna-Maria, I know this place, it looks so..." he trailed off for a minute and then "BLOODY HELL WE"RE BACK IN PORT ROYAL!"

            "Yes," Anna-Maria replied haughtily. "You didn't seriously think we were going to leave Elizabeth and Will behind, did you?"

            "Well I bloody well hoped so"

            "Think again. Then we are off to Tortuga. You still owe me a ship. Two after breaking that *small* promise of giving me the best ship in the Royal Navy."

            "Bloody Will"

The ship docked in the town's lesser known Harbor. It was almost completely abandoned save two or three ships. Elizabeth hurried on board.

            "Sorry I had to have you guys come back here but the other harbor has been on a very tight security watch ever since the Pearl ransacked the town. But fortunately almost no one knows about this dock. It's my father's private dock."

            "Your father has his own _dock_? Are you sure you want to give all this up?" A crew member asked

            "Yes, I am sure. I want freedom, I want excitement."

            "Whatever. Jack we had better get sailing, the water is calm and we have cover while the moon is hidden behind the clouds."

            Jack looked at Anna–Maria as she spoke and then back at Will and Elizabeth, "this is your last chance. We won't be traveling back this way for awhile. Are you sure?"

            "We're sure." They said in unison.

            Jack steered them out of Port Royal and onto the open seas.

            After an hour so Gibbs passed by Jack and stopped for a short bit of chatter, "Aren't we lucky? No bad weather. Nothing too exciting. Just the way a true pirate should live. Of course I had better be knocking on wood. It's bad luck to talk of such things. Might jinx our good luck."

            "Oh you superstitious git. Can't you ever think of anything other than how we are reeking havoc ourselves. There is no such thing as luck. There is no good luck, no bad luck. Just coincidences."

            "Oh c'mon Jack you can't honestly not believe in luck especially you saw a curse first hand. Besides we were going back to Port Royal, where they probably hate pirates more than any other town. They especially hate you… and this ship. Now how can you deny that we must have had some good luck."

            "I suppose you are right." Jack noted sarcastically, "wouldn't want anything exciting to happen. We want smooth sailing. That's how I became the infamous _Captain Jack Sparrow_. Never having to face mighty storms, beat impossible odds, and never having to defeat an enemy. Yeah that's it. You got it. You certainly got the bulls-eye on that one Gibbs."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Narrator: You want excitement Jack? Ill Give you excitement… and stop italicizing your name whenever you say it.

Jack: What no I don't want excitement! I take it back! Smooth sailing is what I said. You just heard Excitement. I wasn't being sarcastic either. I really meant that we were having fun with our smooth sailing and besides I do not italicize my name whenever I say it, watch… _Captain Jack Sparrow!_ Damnit lemme try again, _Captain_ DAMNIT_ Cap_... Oh I give up.

Narrator: Too late Jack… and I proved my point.

Jack: Bloody eunuch

Narrator: What was that?

Jack: nothing, nothing  
  


Narrator: you called me a eunuch!

Jack: *mumbles to self*

Narrator: Jack, I am a GIRL

Jack: well you are NOW!

Narrator: *evil tone to voice* THAT'S IT!

Jack: Bloody Hell

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            Elizabeth saunters up. "Anna-Maria, doesn't that look strangely similar to the Dauntless?" Both ladies turn around and see a ship, with white sails, swiftly approaching. Anna-Maria gave Elizabeth the queerest look before,

            "JACK!!! WHAT DID YOU DO! DID YOU GET IN ANOTHER FIGHT WITH THE NARRATOR. DO YOU HAVE TO MESS UP EVERY FANFIC WE ARE IN!!!???!!! COULDN'T THIS ONE HAVE BEEN A NICE ONE WERE WE SAIL AWAY AND NOTHING HAPPENED. ARE YOU REALLY THAT BIG AN IDIOT???!!!???"

            "This one wasn't my fault. I swear. I'd bet my ship on it. I was commenting on how nice it was to be able to sail away, home free, when the *narrator*" At this moment Jack starts yelling to the sky, "took it as sarcasm and then had the Dauntless come after us. Bloody hell it wasn't my fault."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Narrator: of course not Jack, but don't you have better things to worry about. Say that little ship floating alongside you?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Everyone on deck glances to the port side. There the Dauntless waited for them.

Author's Note: Well yes I certainly did change that and it made the story seem more serious but I hope that the additions to the next chapters stay more to the flow of the story. Please read and review. (Of course you don't have to but it would be nice :o) )


	2. A shipload of crybabies

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Pirates of the Caribbean. Thanks for the reviews. Flames are welcome however. If you don't like it, that's ok, just say so. I mean the more obvious thing to do would not read it but as I'm not really liking anything but the fighting with the narrator myself feel free to give me ideas on how to make it better.  Once again, thanks for all the reviews.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            Commodore Norrington saunterd up to face Jack head on. "You didn't really think I would let a *pirate* get away. Especially not the worst pirate I have ever seen. Did you? Jack Sparrow?"

            Jack, looking fairly annoyed, decides he must inform the Commodore of his mistake, "CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow, if you please. It suits me much better don't you think? I'm sure everyone on this ship can agree to that. Even the bloody narrator can agree to that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Narrator: Well...

Jack: Oh bloody hell.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"There is one way you can save your ship." Commodore Norrington glanced towards Elizabeth. "Her."

            Will rushed to Elizabeth's side as though he is trying to protect her (and you know Will. A fly could come near her and he'd feel the need to protect her.) "Elizabeth has made her choice. Perhaps it wise that you step back before I get angry. And when I get angry, I get mean."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Narrator: Will you don't get mean. I never once saw you get mean.

Will: I CAN be mean. Did you not see me fight with Jack in the Blacksmith's shop back in Port Royal?

Narrator: That wasn't mean, that wasn't even for protection, that was for yourself.  "*I* practice three hours a day. *I* want to fight pirates. *I* don't need a girl. *I* want a chance to get closer to you Jack."

Will: HEY!

Narrator: So I made that last one up do you see my point?

Will: mmph...

Commodore Norrington: Can we please get off of the will bashing and back onto a more interesting subject, say ME and Elizabeth.

Narrator: No, and being a commodore from merry Old England shouldn't you be using proper English and saying "Elizabeth and me."

Commodore Norrington: NO!!!! I come first. They always come first. I wanna come fiiiiiiiirst! *Breaks into tears*

Narrator: Geez louise, no need to go Will on us.

Will: HEY!!!!!!

Jack: Nice that she gets off of my back for one bloody second.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            "Now that she's letting me talk." The Commodore said while glancing at the sky. "I have a small speech to make."

            Everyone else (Including Commodore Norrington's men): Oh Bloody hell

Author's Note: Sorry It's such a short chapter everyone but I really like this one. This is probably my favorite one so far. Not like that chapter 1 *grumble snap* anyways thanks for reading and reviewing!


	3. Norrington's Speech

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Pirates of the Caribbean or any of the characters. Those belong to Disney.

**Author's Note**: Thanks for the reviews! I am going to make it so there is more fighting with the narrator than actual story because that is a lot more fun to do. If you review I will respond. It's the least I can do to thank you for taking the time to give me your thoughts. 

**FireValKyrie**: your review really helped me make my decision final and your reviews kept me laughing. 

**Mrs-Spacemonkey-Jackson**: I'm glad you like it! Thanks for reading and reviewing

**Estelisminegoaway**: Interesting name! Thanks for reading!

**FantisyChick**: Yes I will keep updating. Never fear, thanks for reading and reviewing

**Sparrowslove**: Thanks for reading. I will be reading your fanfic as soon as I am finished with this chapter. 

**Girlgunslinger**: Thanks for reading and reviewing. 

**Fairy of Obsession**: Nice name! Yes it is unprofessional and I love it. In school it seems like we never get to do free lance writing, it's essays, essays, essays. So I decided to leap on the opportunity to do a parody in an unstructured manner. Thanks for the reviews.

**Orlando-Bloom-Fangirl**: Orlando Bloom is hot and did an amazing job in Lord of the Rings. However, he really pissed me off in this movie due to his "we must save Elizabeth!" attitude. Thanks for reading and reviewing.

**Alexandria**** Peterson**: Hey like your name! Mine name is your name minus the I… OK sorry I just had to say that. Oh yeah and my last name's different. Hee hee. I am updating now to answer your question.

And now onto the story

Chapter 3: Norrington's speech

"I have been fighting pirates as long as I can remember. I can fight this entire ship with my right hand tied behind my back. I am a leader of men, a fighter for the people. I represent those that cannot represent themselves. I speak for those that cannot speak. I walk for those that cannot walk. In short, I do what others cannot do. I am a commodore, a man of honor, prestige. I am no filthy pirate. I take care of others. When I see a dog I do not kick it hard, only a little, and ONLY so that it will get out of my way. When I see a kitten stuck in a tree, I halt the cutting of such tree until the kitten has been shot down. I…" as Norrington continues his speech about how honorable he is, the men are forming their own plan.

            All of the men, and in the case of Elizabeth and Anna-Maria, women, are working together to get Norrington to shut up. Gibbs is "dancing" in front of Norrington to distract him. Will is trying to get him to take one step back and "accidentally" fall overboard. Norrington's men are preparing the _Dauntless_ to sail back to Port Royal. But it would seem that Jack and Elizabeth were the only ones who were really using their noggins. Jack was setting the boon so that he could cut it and it would fly up and hit Norrington in the face. Elizabeth was preparing to grab Norrinotn's wig and hide it as soon as Jack did. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Piece of advice: never take a vain man's wig

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            Norrington noticed none of this and continued on with his speech "I am a man of valor. A man worthy of notice. Yet despite all this I am not afraid to throw a piece of advice to the beggar on the street. Of course I wouldn't give them money but hey, I often pass through that part of town on my way to the tailor's to get my new suit fitted and I have to look good whereas they are a beggar so they don't need to look good. And what is this bit of advice you might ask? Why I simply tell them 'get your butt off the ground. You are making this city disgusting, why don't you make something of yourself? Look at me, look at you. Who do you think deserves to live in this city? You should get a job. If I find you here tomorrow I will have you hanged.' That usually gets them out of there. I hear that they go to the neighboring harbor town and become quite wealthy. Some of their businesses are so exclusive as to make sure that if me or any of my men were to ever set foot in their shop that we would be 'toast' whatever that means. It shows how grateful they are. Of course I sometimes have to fire my help but I always do it in such a gentle way that they leave this town. I once heard a rumor it was because I did something to their reputation, probably enhanced it. Now I don't mean to toot my own horn but I have been known to turn a few heads. I am not only a commodore but a handsome one as well. Most women don't even know that I am in my 50s. They say "really that young!" I do exfoliate my skin every day after all and…" 

            That was all Jack needed to hear. With one swift motion the boon was cut, hitting Norrington in the face. Elizabeth grabbed his wig, tossed it to Will, who tossed it to Gibbs, who threw it in the broom closet. They all looked smug knowing that Norrington wouldn't touch a broom closet even if Barbossa came back and threatened to curse him if he didn't. Norrington glared at Jack.

            "THAT WAS INTENTIONAL. I'M GOING TO HAVE THE NARRATOR KICK YOUR RUMP INTO THE NEXT GENERATION!!!! TELL HIM NARRY!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Narrator: OK, first of all, I didn't see Jack do anything, I was, uhhh, washing my dog. Second, You do not, under any circumstances, call me "Narry" I should kick your *rump* into the next generation just for that. If you seriously think Narrator is too long well then, guess what? I don't care. It's narrator. Not Narry, Nar, Narb, Narro, tator, rator, bob, narrat, raty, or any other name you can come up with. It's Narrator. N-A-R-R-A-T-O-R. Kapish? OK. Seriously, you totally deserved whatever Jack gave you.

Norrington: B-but.

Narrator: No, I don't want to hear it. 

  
Norrington: But I'm the commodore!!! *whimpers*

Narrator: Shut up. You aren't a dog. You don't need to whimper. Seriously. Even *WILL* isn't that pathetic.

Will: *smirks*

Norrington: But Will's a eunuch.

Jack: *Smirks*

Narrator: Well only one person can verify that, Elizabeth?

*all turn to Elizabeth*

Elizabeth: *smiles proudly* Believe me he's not eunuch. _Believe me_.

Will: *smirks at Jack*

Narrator: Now who's to prove that you aren't a eunuch, Norrington?

Norrington: But I'm the commodore!!! *continues to whimper*

Narrator: There, there. *pats Norrington on head, Whispers to Jack* Just hide him in the corner or something. 

Jack: *nods and drags Norrington into the darkest corner on deck*

Narrator: *turns to Norrington's men* Now, back to business. Why don't you people just head on home to your families. No offense or anything but you aren't really adding to the plot. But I might bring you back later.

Norrington's men: Yeah…OK…That sounds fair….Sure….My wife's pregnant…Oh really?...Congratulations…Thanks…Yeah, I want to see my daughter off before she gets married…*the men continue with the pointless chatter as they sail off*

Narrator: Now that's that taken care of let's sail on to Tortuga

Jack: Wait we are taking Norrington with is? 

Narrator: Oh shush up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Author's Note: Even if I make something bold in word it doesn't transfer over… can anyone tell me how to make it so that it does. Also, I was reading some other fanfics and they mention _OC_s, what are these? If you have any ideas as to how I can make this story better please tell me, your criticism is welcome. Flames are OK too.


	4. Was it Really a Plot Twist?

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Pirates of the Caribbean. If I did I would be filthy rich on the profits that movie made. Ah, nothing like a summer blockbuster to really warm your heart.

**Author's Note**: Thanks for the reviews everybody! I hope you continue to enjoy these works. I am not sure how great this chapter is going to be as I am writing this as I have the stomach flu. Yesterday I had thought I was better but it came back today… with an attitude. *Sighs* Well anyways, thanks again for the reviews. Also I finished reviewing the other chapters. That's it, I am done, they are staying the way they are, I don't care how bad they turn out to be. Whew that took a lot out of me. Let's hope Johnny Depp wins the Academy Award as he was the only reason I didn't tear my eyes out during _Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl_. WHOO GO JOHNNY!

**FireValkyrie**: Yes your reviews are greatly appreciated. I actually wasn't planning on doing anything with Norrington in that corner but now I am getting ideas. *Grins* Heh heh heh…

**Estelisminegoaway**: Yes well I thought that Norrington acted more like a eunuch than Will so I decided to throw that in there. Thanks for the review.

**Alexandria**** Peterson**: Oh never fear, Norrington will get more than his share of taunting. Although occasionally I do feel bad at taking such cheap shots, I wonder if I should be challenging myself more. *shrugs* Oh well, that's no reason to stop

**Fairy of Obsession**: Thanks for your help! I will be using your advice on how to make things bold… Let's see if it worked. I sure hope so. I installed Word on my computer and uninstalled Corel so I no longer have to use notepad. I hope that because of that bold and italics will transfer. Also I believe I am going to have to agree with Delphein on the OC thing. Her description seems to fit better into what other authors have written. However, depending on the author your definition fits better too. All I know is that when I hear OC I think of the TV show :o) Thanks for the review and for your help!

**Delphein**: Thanks for the help, I may need to e-mail. Also thanks for clearing up the OC thing. That really helps as I was so confused earlier. I am glad you like the first chapter. I have a theory on Norrington: he is actually the most realistic character; he knows that he can not send the entire British Royal Navy after one person. However this being a Disney they have to portray him as obnoxious and conceited. I think they did such a convincing job of this that I need to portray this in my story. Thanks for your review and for your help!

**Orlando**** Bloom-Fangirl**: Well I think your explanation helped clear it up. So here's my theory explaining the "OC" thing: OC means original character and OOC means out of character. That explains a lot. Your extra O idea really helped clear things up for me thanks! I agree that Orlando Bloom is incredibly hot. Heh heh heh. However I am more of a Legolas person myself… I think I have the perfect fanfic for you. It's under books Lord of the Rings, it's called "Fighting for Love" by Sweet Arwen. It's a Mary-Sue that is so well written and follows the context of the story to a near exact that it is incredibly easy to get into. I would give you a summary but I think it would be easier to read it yourself. Thanks for the review!

**SparrowsLove**: I'm glad my story makes you laugh! *blushes slightly* Hmmm if you need story ideas you can IM me (with AIM/AOL) at Xandra8650 or you can e-mail me at DizzyGrl200@aol.com for further ideas. 

**LotRFreak144**: I did not steal your thing about flames! It just a coincidence that they are similar. Thanks for reviewing

**ViggyGRL**: Thanks for the review! I am glad you like it! Don't worry I am going to update as soon as I finish responding to your review and revising it once more times.

And now onto chapter 4: Was it really a plot twist?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            Norrington roused in his corner. Where was he? How did he get there? What happened to him? "I must have hit my head harder than I thought" he murmured. He was obviously trying to block out the fact that he had fainted after his fight with the narrator. Of course Jack _might_ have hit him on the head. He was in that corner with Norrington a little longer than he should have been. 

He looked up to see the bright sun. 'Well that's strange.' He thought 'normally, in kidnappings, it is very dark and dank. At least we have the musty smell. Hmmm, my hands aren't tied up either, what kind of kidnapping is this?' He stood up and sauntered over to the other side of the ship.

"Well, well look what the cat dragged in" Will smirked at him and, for added affect, took Elizabeth's hand in his own.

Elizabeth merely looked at him. 

"Why did you _pirates_ leave me here? Why couldn't I have remained with… MY CREW???!!!??? WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY CREW??!!?? WHY AREN'T THEY HERE???!!!???"

"Oh relax," Jack sighed, exasperated, "We are going to drop you back off in Port Royal. We wouldn't even have you here if it weren't for the narrator. She just wanted to throw in a plot twist."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Narrator: As I recall Jack, it was your own stupidity that brought the Dauntless here in the first place. 

Jack: *deep sigh*

Narrator: Oh don't even try and deny it. You know it was you.

Jack: We were fine until they *points at Elizabeth and Will* showed up

Elizabeth: Oh don't blame this on us.

Jack: And why the bloody hell shouldn't I?

Elizabeth: Because it WAS you!!

Jack: I shouldn't have to put up with this.

Narrator: Unfortunately you do

Jack: Bloody Eunuch

Narrator: Now, now Jack, that's what screwed you over in the first place

Jack: AAAAAAAA! I am on the ship with a bunch of nutcases!

Everyone on board: HEY!

Narrator: No denials here

Everyone: *turns to stare at narrator*

Narrator: What???!!!??? I know I am weird! Besides, we have gotten completely off topic

Jack: What was our topic again?

Narrator: *sighs* You said I threw in a plot twist…

Jack: oh right… you did throw in a plot twist!

Narrator: No Jack a plot twist would be this *snaps fingers*

Buffy: where are we?

Jack: who are you?

Willow: Who are _you?_

Xander: you never saw this movie? It was like the summer's biggest blockbuster. 

Willow: I was in London learning how to use magic without becoming addicted Xander

Xander: Oh right.

*meanwhile*

Dawn: *shrieks* AAAA! Oh my… AAAA! I thought you were so sexy and…. *more calmly* Guys, why are we on _The Black Pearl_?

Narrator: I was just showing Jack what a real plot twist is. Now, back to Sunnydale *snaps fingers* You see Jack?

Jack: Well bringing the Dauntless here was a plot twist too!

Narrator: Not you too, so far the only person that hasn't whined are the girls.

Jack: *shuts mouth and sulks*

Narrator: That's it! I am leaving you people! Jack's right, you are a bunch of nutcases. *flies up into sky with umbrella, strangely like Mary Poppins*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            Norrington turned and gave Jack a smug look "you see Jack, it was you that brought me here. Narry I MEAN, the Narrator said so herself.

            "Don't make me hurt you Norrington." And with that Jack turned and left.

            "Well, I hope you all learned your lesson," said Anna-Maria, leaving a very perplexed Will and Elizabeth.

            Gibbs got up as well, "I best be getting some shut eye before Totuga. We shall be docking soon I suppose."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

UP NEXT: Norrington's adventure in Tortuga!

Author's Note: Thanks again for the reviews everybody! Remember if you review I will respond… If you can take the time so can I! Thanks for everyone's help clearing up the OC issue. You guys are great!


	5. Poker, Nicknames, and a Harmonica

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Pirates of the Caribbean. Or any of the characters. Or Hersheys. Or Nestle. Or Pepsi. Or Coca-Cola. Or Kellog's. Or Skippy Peanut Butter. Or Crayola. Or General Mill's. Or Johnson & Johnson. Or Gerber. Or Band-Aid brand bands-aids. Or Mary Poppins. Or Harry Potter. Or Laura Ashley. Or Nike, Reebok, Addidas, Scholastic Inc., Columbia Records, Britney Spears, AT&T, Verizon Wireless, Timex, Toshiba, Panosonic, Quaker, Disney, Wal-Mart, Sharper Image, Slim Fast, Crate & Barrel, or Pottery Barn. Not that I plan on mentioning all those but I think it should be made known that I do not own any of these corporations/people. The only person/thing I own in this entire fic is me, the narrator.

**Author's Note**: I am so sorry I haven't updated in so long. I got really sick and then I got writer's block, and a serious case of it. Then I wrote some stuff down in a notebook during school and Surprise, surprise, I lost the notebook. And now for the news. There is good news and there is bad news. The bad news: We have the biggest paper any of us in the school district will have ever had to write thus far (If any high school juniors and seniors are reading this they'd laugh at be calling it "big") This means I probably won't be able to update for quite a few weeks. The good news: After that the three biggest things we have to do this year will be over and then I can update a lot. Until then here is a chapter: I hope it is satisfactory. Oh and the other good news: I found out how to do bold and italics and such. Thanks for your help everybody!

**Almost Funny**: Thanks for the review! I am glad you like my fic! 

**SparrowsLove**: Go ahead and help yourself! I am glad your story makes you laugh. That makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside! Thanks for the review!

*****POTCLUVA*****: I am glad you like the fic! Who said anything about making Jack gay? I wasn't planning on it, never fear. Thanks for the review! Oh and by the way, Orlando's mine.

**LOTRFreak144:** I am glad you like my fic! Thanks for the compliment. I appreciate it despite the fact that I am not living up to my full potential here! Thanks for the review!

**TalenelsMyYami**: Yes you did help. You were the final verification I needed between the 'OC' and 'OOC' thing. Thanks! I am glad I had you laughing… Thanks for the review!

**Cptnjcksparrow**: Wow! Thanks for the review! I am brilliant!!??!! Whoa wasn't expecting that but I think I can deal with that! I hope I come up with some comical lines but as I said, I got sick again so who knows? (When I get sick I just tend to ramble) Now I am off to flaunt my brilliance in my brother's face. *Walks off occasionally yelling things like "E=MC^2!" and "To be or not to be, that is the question!"*  

**Alexandria**** Peterson**: Thanks for your review! I am glad… damnit I am saying the same thing to everybody. I need to think up a new line. *thinks* I know! Have some chocolate! Ah that works, much better.

**FireValkyrie**: Whoa your review made me laugh! You Hmmm I just got a brilliant idea. ;o) Thanks for the review!... A few days later… I was reading about an episode of _Charmed_ and well, "the Valkyries, demi-goddesses who preside over fallen warriors who have died in battle".. I dunno why that's relevant, I just thought it was interesting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Narrator: *playing the harmonica* Ooooh ma mama left me. *harmonica* An' ma papa did too. *harmonica* But I just like this country-western tune. *harmonica solo* 

Jack: *hack cough cough*

Narrator: *looks up* Oh hello Jack! What are you doing wandering around this ship??

Jack: Bloody hell I am the Captain of this ship! I should not have to have a reason to walk around my OWN ship. I should be able to do whatever I please. Do I need a reason savvy?

Narrator: *blinks*

Jack: Well… If you _MUST_ know I was off to find Norrington, I haven't seen the git in a few… *gets cut off by Elizabeth*

Elizabeth: Have you seen Norrington?

Narrator: *shakes head and disappears with a small pop* POP

Jack: *doesn't notice this* I was just telling the narrator that I was on my way to find the git myself.

Elizabeth: Ummmm Jack? The narrator isn't here… exactly how much rum did you have today?

Jack: Bloody hell she was here a minute ago.

Elizabeth: I'm going to leave you alone Jack. You obviously have some issues to work out.

Jack: *shouts to sky* Bloody hell Narrator! Making me seem crazy!!! *continues to rant*

Meanwhile….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

               Norrington paced around his cabin. It was the smallest cabin on board but at least he didn't have to sleep with the crew. (Little did he know _They_wouldn't sleep with _him_.) 'How to get out of here' he thought. 'If only I had some parchment on which I could plan an escape.'

               Norrington looked up when he heard his name however. "Norrington? Norrington?!!?"

               "I KNOW THAT VOICE!" He opened the door in an excited rush. "Yes Elizabeth, my sweet?"

               "Please refrain from calling me 'your sweet.' I am with Will now. I am truly sorry if you can't accept that."

               "But Elizabeth! We are meant to be together. They put us together at the beginning of the movie."

               "Yes but it was to Will to whom my affections were immediately drawn. Besides, I was ten and you were already grown, doesn't that disturb you at all… the thought that you are almost 20 years older than me?"

               "No it does not, because we are soul mates."

               "But will was the one who risked his life to save me, allowing plenty of time for me to act like the heroine of the movie AND allowed ample time to make corset jokes."

               *retching sound comes from sky*

               "Elizabeth, my peach, what were you calling me for?"

               "Oh yes. Will and I would like to see you."

               "Will?"

               "Yes, _WILL_. We will be expecting to see you up there shortly." And with that Elizabeth walked off.

               Norrington sauntered on deck to find Will, Elizabeth, Gibbs, and a few other crew members playing cards. Elizabeth appeared to be winning, as was obvious by the mountain of poker chips surrounding her. Murmurs came from the man as they wondered how not just a woman, but a governor's daughter who had spent her whole life refraining from such activities, could be whooping their asses. "Beginner's luck." Some said. Others just shook their heads.

               "Hello Elizabeth. I have come upon your request. I would not have left my cabin otherwise but you seemed to need my aid and I decided I best come to your side."

               "Finally!" Exclaimed Elizabeth as she shot up. "Well first things first, does this dress make my chin look big?"

               "That's what you called me here for?"

               "No not just that… Will and I wanted to discuss our situation."

               "Oh Will," The commodore mocked, "threatened that Elizabeth might fall for a real man?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Narrator: I thought we'd already discussed this Norrington, you are the eunuch.

Norrington: I'd appreciate it if you would stop appearing out of no where! Look you gave the pirate with the parrot a heart attack.

*All turn to face man with parrot clutching chest*

Narrator: *waves hand* there he's healed. We have bigger issues to discuss

Will: Like what?

Narrator: Tortuga

Elizabeth: Really?

Narrator: no that would be giving out top secret information on the next chapter. What I really came here to talk about are cameo appearances.

Will: What?

Narrator: If any one reading this wants to make a guest appearance as anything; fangirl, annoyance, or just someone to say hi, all they have to do is ask. The only thing I won't allow are requests from Mary-Sue wannabes. They can make their own cheap ass story.

Norringon: Actually I wouldn't mind having a few Mary-Sues. I could use the ego boost.

Narrator: I have something very special in mind for you Norrington.

Norrington: *color drains from face* W-w-w-what is it?

Narrator: Oh you'll find out soon enough. 

*Jack comes on deck*

Jack: There you are! 

Narrator & Norrington: (in unison) Me? Or him?

Narrator: *smacks Norrington upside the head* I'm a 'her' you twit.

Norrington: *whimper*

Jack: Actually both of you. But as you've made Norrington unavailable at the moment I will talk to you. 

Narrator: …

Jack: WHAT THE BLOODY HELL DID YOU DO THAT FOR!!!??!! 

Narrator: *shrugs shoulders* I dunno, it was fun, easy, amusing, enjoyable…

Jack: Enough with the synonyms.

Narrator: Hey! You were the one who asked me in the first place.

Jack: Oh be quiet.

Narrator: Oh by the way, would you like to have some fangirl cameo appearances?

Jack: yeah… sure… whatever.

Narrator: OK then

Norrington: *still whimpering* I want a fangirl

Narrator: I already told you, I have something special for you.

Norrington: *whimper*

Jack: Can we just get on with the next chapter please?

Narrator: fine, fine

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Coming Up: **

**-** What does Jack say to Norrington?

- What is the secret surprise?

- TORTUGA!!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Author's Note**: Will's too pretty to be a eunuch


	6. A Secret Revealed

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. You hear me? NOTHING, Not Pirates of the Caribbean, not Sir Mix-A-Lot, NOTHING

**Author's Note:** Hey everyone! I am starting this chapter right away because my writer's block is gone and I already know what I want to do for the next two chapters. Woooo! Go me! Remember flame's are OK. But all reviews are great.

**FireValkyrie****:** Once again your review made me laugh. My mom always thinks I am weird when I read your reviews because it's like I am laughing to myself, actually I don't think she likes any joy coming from me until AFTER I've practiced the cello. Anyways moving on, I am glad you liked my chapter but that is definitely not one of my favorites but I have a good feeling about this one.

**LotRFreak144:** Dictionary.com defines a eunuch as a "man or boy whose testes are nonfunctioning or have been removed" OR "An ineffectual, powerless, or unmasculine man" I couldn't have said it better myself. I plan on using savvy whenever it seems like a "Jack Time" to say it, not actually when understand would be used. Is that OK by you, savvy? 

**Chapter 6 – The Secret revealed**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Scene opens to Narrator on deck… just like last time.

Narrator: *humming _Baby Got Back_* __
    
    _I like big butts and I can not lie_
    
    _You other brothers can't deny_
    
    _That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist_
    
    _And a round thing in your face_
    
    _You get sprung_
    
    _Wanna__ pull up tough_
    
    _Cuz__ you notice that butt was stuffed_
    
    _Deep in the jeans she's wearing_
    
    _I'm hooked and I can't stop staring_
    
    _Oh, baby I wanna get with ya…. _
    
    *stops short at site of Norrington*

Norrington: Why look it's the narrator, the cruel heartless women who hates all of us.

Narrator: That's not true. I like Jack! He's a lot of fun

Norrington: Fine whatever

Narrator: Why are you so grumpy? (NOTE: I mean the mood! I did not mean the dwarf! *screams as she is attacked by Disney lawyers*)

Norrington: Because, no one here likes me

Narrator: Why that's not true. I am sure they would like you… if I wasn't writing it so that they don't.

Norrington: Oh please, Jack wouldn't like me anyways. Neither would any of the other crew.

Narrator: Well that's because you people are natural born enemies. Why don't you wait until you go back home to Port Royal where you have friends?

Norrington: Yes, but that's awhile away. In any case, Elizabeth and I aren't natural born enemies. Yet she refused my proposal. 

Narrator: Have you ever thought that it's because she loves Will and always has? And it's really nothing against you. She would have picked Will over the King of England! Besides, can you see why it might bother her that you are twenty years older than her?

Norrington: Not really… after all this is the 17th century. 

Narrator: True

Norrington: Well I better be going. Elizabeth and Will want to discuss our "situation" 

Narrator: Have fun! *Turns into a fish and jumps into the ocean*

Norrington: That lass is a strange one

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(A/N: Don't worry, I am only letting Norrington have one brief moment of sanity.)

            Norrington walked over to the part of deck where Elizabeth and Will were. "So what do you want to discuss?"

            Elizabeth was the one to start, "we think that my choosing Will over you and everything might have left some hard feelings between the two of you, so I am going to have you two shake hands right here."

            Norrington glanced at Will, "you want this?"

            Will opened his mouth to speak but was stopped short by Elizabeth elbowing him, "yes he wants it very much."

            "Let's do it for Elizabeth, Will. No hard feelings?"

            "Uh yeah… are you sure you are OK with this?"

            "yes, sadly it is been shown to me that you and Elizabeth are truly meant to be together."

Elizabeth and Will watched dumbstruck as Norrington walked out of the room

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Narrator: *appearing out of nowhere* Well I am most proud of you Norrington. You proved yourself mature and responsible.

Norrington: thank you

Narrator: I thought of a question I wanted to ask you while I was swimming in the ocean

Norrington: Oh? And what would that be?

Narrator: What's your first name?

Norrington: First… name?

Narrator: You know the one your friends call you by

Norrington: Oh, you mean commodore!

Narrator: uh, no

Norrington: But I am a Commodore!

Narrator: I know you are but…

Norrington: In fact! I am a commodore! Elizabeth should be with me not that scoundrel, Will. He doesn't even have a career! Is he a pirate? Is he a blacksmith? Is he a blacksmithing pirate?

Narrator: What happened to the nice, sane you?

Norrington: He's back! All thanks to you Narry! I guess I was just acting so strange because I was so hurt that I Elizabeth picked Will and I thought I couldn't get her back, but now I know I can and will.

*thunder clashes and lightening strikes*

Narrator: I've told you not to call me Narry! 

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And with one great strike Norrington was forced back with a bolt of lightening. He left his scorch mark on the wall as he slid down onto the deck of the ship. He stood and saw that the lightening had not destroyed the boat, it had instead left a shape. He walked over to see what it was and to his immense surprise a young, teenage girl stood before him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FireValkyrie: Hey I am in the fic! Cool!

Narrator: I called you here in hopes that you might be able to take care of him. *points towards Norrington* 

FireValkyrie: Well as much as I love annoying Norry and everything I think I am going to need some collateral.

Narrator: Well you'd be spending a lot of time on the ship meaning you'd get to spend a lot of time with Jack

FireValkyrie: Deal! Now You, *turns to Norry* I think we had better get to work.

Narrator: Ah that's a load off of my back. Bye Norrington! I hope you like your special surprise!!!... I suppose I shall go find Jack.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FireValkyrie: C'mon Norry! Let's play a game!

Norry: Number one; I am a commodore, I do not play games. Number two; Stop calling me Norry!

FireValkyrie: The narrator left you in my hands so now I can call you whatever I want. Besides, you calling the narrator, "Narry" is what brought me here in the first place.

Norry: That's different!

FireValKyrie: How?

Norry: Because; I am a Commodore, I demand and deserve respect. I am man of stature, people should look up to me and admire me.

FireValkyrie: You can't _demand_ respect. You _earn _respect. You know for a commodore, you certainly don't have too many manners.

Norry: What??!!? I have plenty of manners! I am…

FireValkyrie: blah, blah, blah… Everything you say is repetitive and dull. I think you need speech lessons. In fact, *light bulb overhead brightens* come on Norry.

Norry: Where are you taking me?

FireValkyrie: To see the narrator, I want to ask her if she can write in you going to boarding school.

Norry: Wait right there, I do not need to go to boarding school. I have impeccable manners, am wonderfully groomed, and eat healthy foods. I am perfect. Also, I thought she was the narrator… isn't it the author that writes the story?

FireValkyrie: You idiot, haven't you figured out yet that she IS the author/narrator. She just prefers to go by Narrator.

Norry: No, I did not know that.

FireValkyrie: Now you do, you idiot.

Norry: You know I am a commodore, there's no need to be calling me an idiot.

FireValkyrie: I see plenty of need

Norry: But then you would be a liar giving me plenty of reason to sing: _Liar, Liar Pants on fire_ over and over and over again until my voice is all you can ever hear. Even when you are trying to get to sleep at night, all you can think of is my voice.

FireValkyrie: OR, I could do this *snaps fingers* 

Norry: *mouth has a giant zipper across it which happens to be zipped* 

FireValkyrie: *looks at Norry like an artist surveying her work* Yes… yes this will do nicely.

Norry: mmmmph!!

FireValkyrie: *back turned* What's that Norry? I can't hear you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Narrator: C'mon Jack, why don't you let Anna-Maria take over for a little bit? You need a break

Jack: I don't need a break. What I do need is me rum

Narrator: Well then come with me to get some.

Jack: No, but if you could get me some that would be great

Narrator: C'mon Jack, why not?

Jack: You are a strange lass. Writing this story and all and not knowin' why I wouldn't want to take a break. 

Narrator: Clarify it, for the readers

Jack: The last time I took a break that happened, *points to Will*, and then he and his bonnie lass cause Norrington to happen. Do you see why I might be a little hesitant to take a break?

Narrator: Ah yes but I control everything and as long as you don't piss me off I won't cause anything to happen.

Jack: Well you got a point there. All right perhaps a little rum will do me good.

Narrator: That's the spirit

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FireValkyrie: You know Norry, you aren't so bad when you can't speak

Norry: mmmph

FireValkyrie: Well you have a point there, your voice is critical to the plot. *snaps fingers*

Norry: ah much better.

FireValkyrie: yeah, yeah, whatever you say.

Norry: *looks at heading* Stop Calling me Norry!!!

FireValkyrie: no I don't think I will

Norry: why not?

FireValkyrie: because it bugs you and teaches you a lesson in humility, one which will be invaluable at boarding school

Norry: You know, they won't accept a 43 year old man at boarding school

FireValKyrie: hmmmm, I suppose you are right. *snaps fingers*

Norry: *high voice* What???!!!?? *looks down at body* AAAAA I am ten years old again

FireValkyrie: ten years old in _body_, your mind remains the same

Norry: Oh well that's good

FireValkyrie: C'mon, chop chop, we need to go find the Narrator

Norry: Yeah, we do, maybe she will send you away

FireValkyrie: Only after I've sufficiently bugged you.

Norry: mmmph

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Narrator: So Jack

Jack: RUM! I NEED MORE RUM!

Narrator: *waves hand* there more rum. Now, we need to talk.

Jack: About what?

Narrator: About your conversation with Norrington

Jack: What about it?

Narrator: What were you going to say?

Jack: I dunno; some stuff about not speaking, staying in his cabin all day, him being a bloody git.

Narrator: So basically you were just seeking him out to insult him?

Jack: Yeah, pretty much.

Narrator: Oh OK, so then it won't damage the plot if I don't include it despite earlier attempts?

Jack: No not really, besides I am over it by now

Narrator: Oh well that's good

Jack: Is that all you wanted to talk about?

Narrator: *thinks* hmmm yeah I suppose that's it

Jack: Very good savvy!

Narrator: Well I will be seeing you then, *turns into Harry Potter* 

Jack: *falls out of chair laughing* HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

Narrator: Crap! I said "Portal" NOT "Potter"

Jack: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA 

Narrator: It's not funny Jack, *disappears with a small pop*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            Will looked at Elizabeth and uttered four little words, the four little words that could change everything, the four little words that could turn everything around, the four words that can separate the men from the boys. "No queens, go fish" (A/N: 20 bucks says you were thinking he was going to say "Will you marry me?")

            "You know Will," Elizabeth as she stroked his hands, "We could make this game more interesting."

            Will just smiled and laughed, "You are only mad that you are losing, besides you can't play strip, go fish."

            "Oh can't we?" Elizabeth smirked and picked up a top card of the deck, "Well it looks like my luck is changing!" she said as she placed down four cards. She gracefully brushed her hair off her shoulder and smiled gently at Will.

            "OK! OK! If you really want to play the 'interesting' version that bad then we will do so"

            "I thought you might change your mind" Won't we have to start another game then?"

            Will suddenly stood up shocked, "So that _was_ you plan all along, start a new game and make me look like the idiot when I am sitting here in my shorts and you have all the cards!" He glared at her and continued, "That was you plan all along wasn't it? WASN'T IT?"

            Elizabeth only looked mildly taken aback however, "What to win Go Fish and get you to take your clothes off in the process? Yes that was my plan. Is that so wrong?" she said.

            Will sat back down, "no, just so long as we're clear."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FireValkyrie: Anna-Maria, would you happen to know where Jack is?

Anna-Maria: I think he went somewhere with the narrator.

FireValkyrie: *grumble snap*

Random Pirate: They went into the galley

FireValkyrie: Oh, thanks.

Random Pirate: No problem

FireValkyrie: C'mon Norry

Norry: *sigh*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Narrator: *turns upon hearing name* Oh hey FireValkyrie! Hey Norrington!

Norrington: See! She calls me Norrington!

FireValkyrie: *kicks Norry in the shin* Happy, _Norrington_? 

Norrington: *whimpers* no

Jack: *laughs* that was great! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

Narrator: Quiet Jack

Jack: I see you got that little "Potter" problem fixed

Narrator: Quiet Jack

FireValkyrie: I wanted to ask you something

Narrator: OK

FireValkyrie: What do you think about sending Norrington to boarding school?

Jack: Oh that's rich! You hear that Norry? You are going to boarding school!

Norrington: *girlish scream* Why are you people so mean to me???

Narrator: *ignores him* Well despite the fact that he now looks young enough to be sent to boarding school, he can't miss Tortuga.

FireValkyrie: It would provide an interesting plot twist

Narrator: Hmm I suppose you are right… I'll think about it later on in the story I suppose

FireValkyrie: OK, cool

Narrator: Oh by the way! Jack this is FireValkyrie, FireValkyrie this is Jack

Jack: Perhaps I could get to know you better later on, say in my cabin.

Narrator: *slaps Jack upside the head* JACK! You don't need to hit on every woman on the ship!

Jack: I haven't… Have you seen me flirting with Norry over there?

Norrington: HEY!

Narrator: I suppose that's true

FireValkyrie: I am sorry Jack but as I am only 17…

Jack: *whistles* International waters *whistles*

Narrator: I will have to keep an eye on you Jack. Dear Lord! What'll I do when the fangirls start to come??!!??

Jack: Well I will be having a wonderful time meself

Norrington: I as well, will be enjoying the company of the fangirls.

Narrator: If anyone _wants_ to be your fangirl Norrington, then they can have you

Norrington: WoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoT!!!!!!!!!!

Narrator: Well we'll see how much fun you'll have in Tortuga.

Norrington: *whimpers*

Narrator: *turns to leave* OH! Before I go! *snaps fingers* 

Norrington: My body! My _real _body! *glares at FireValkyrie*

Narrator: Whatever, you people are twisted enough, besides I have to go narrate Will and Elizabeth's scene. *a portal appears* *jumps through*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            "This is rather remarkable Elizabeth, you keep losing." Will said to Elizabeth as she removed another stocking. (How could she? Scandalous!) 

            "Oh you just wait Will Turner, you just wait."

            "Until what?"

            "Tortuga, my sweet, Tortuga."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Author's Note:** Wow! That was my longest chapter ever. I will probably post in a few days after having reviewed a few times. I have a few apologies to make. First of all, I apologize for the shoddy writing on previous chapters. Seventh grade killed a lot of things for me. I used to love to write and I was damn good at it to, if I do say so myself. Then in seventh grade we never did anything but essays so I never really got any practice. The same thing happened with reading, I suppose seventh grade just screwed me over. Anyways, I feel that these chapter are gradually improving (except for Chapter 5, there was a lot I didn't like about that one) Thanks for reading and reviewing, you guys are the greatest!

**Wanted:** Fangirls! Pick a character, any character! Also, I need someone who is willing to annoy Elizabeth

**Confession:** I LOVE LEGOLAS MARY-SUE'S! OK, well I take that back I only like one of them, but in any case it's a total Mary-Sue but I like it anyways. Woo, I am glad I got that off of my chest!


	7. The End

**LotRFreak144:** Your wish is my command!

**Ping****Pong5:** You, officially, have the coolest name to ever come into existence. Something about the words Ping and Pong just sends me into fits of laughter. You have your wish as this is finally the chapter where I bring them into Tortuga (I hope. Ever since chapter 3 I have started the chapter thinking I was going to bring them into Tortuga and then I haven't) Oh, there will be much, much more Norrington humiliation.

Norrington: Hey! I thought you were going to lay off for a couple chapters!

Narrator: I dunno why you would… waiiiit… what are you doing in the review section?

Norrington: looks around with shifty eyes trying to get away from _The Evil One_

Narrator: who??!!??

Norrington: _THE EVIL ONE!!!!!_

Narrator: You mean Barbossa?

Norrington: no

Narrator: Ragetti?

Norrington: no

Narrator: Then who?

Norrington: FireValKyrie

Narrator: Oh her.

Norrington: yes,_ her_

Narrator: What's wrong with her?

Norrington: She's evil

Narrator: Now don't you think that's going to extremes?

Norrington: No!!!!

FireValKyrie appears

FireValKyrie: There you are Norry!

Norrington: screams and runs away

Narrator: Ah, nothing like a little Norrington bashing to start your day!

**Steff7**: Hey, I am glad you like my story! Yes there will be more of Will and Elizabeth.

**Findabhair****:** Norrington, if I do decide to send him to boarding school, will have to wait for a few chapters. First I must complete the adventures in Tortuga. I will most definitely be taking you up on that offer and e-mailing you to understand how boarding school really works. I don't know anyone who goes to boarding school so you will be my reference. I have a lot of ideas now. Thanks for the review!

**FireValKyrie:** You will be appearing many, many times in this story

**Becca: **right

**Sparrowslove****: **I do not know Inuyasha so erm… right. Anyways, here's another update for your enjoyment

**Lil****' Hellcat: **We'll compromise; I get Legolas, you get Will. And of course you can annoy Elizabeth.

**Ashlie****: **Yes, sigh school can have that affect. Sad, isn't it?

**Carol2flute:** thanks for the great recommendation! I'll be checking out your story for info on that.

**Captain Drew:** heh__

Thanks to everyone who reviewed my story! However, I have reread my story multiple times and the writing is just too shoddy for me to even continue on. I am sorry but I know that it will not be of great disappointment to anyone. However, I will be starting a new fic soon. On what however, I have not yet decided. Thanks to everyone for helping me get a leg-up on the defeat of my writers slump. I have several people to thank for that and they are; Ms Walton, Myself, and all of you faithful reviewers. However, on the new fanfics I hope that you will find that my writing has once again improved and blossomed to what it was two years ago. Thank you

Oh and please note that I would continue the story except that they don't allow the 'chat' style, and as my stories were becoming increasingly full of the 'chat' style I would have been forced to take it down if I continued anyways.


End file.
